My wife will often look at me or say something like she just doesn’t understand why I say or do the things I say or do. Though I try to explain unless your a guy your truly not going to understand 100 percent, but we try to explain it anyway which is what I’m going to do now.
First off, I believe one of the biggest issues women just don’t understand about guys is when we adjust ourselves. Now I’m not talking about changing how you are sitting in a chair or anything like that I’m talking about grabbing your crotch, Max, Big Willy, whatever you call it and re-adjust it to a different position. We often get looks when we do this and if done in front of a female other than our significant other we get accused of make some sort of sexual reference because they don’t want to admit they enjoyed watching us grab ourselves. Well, in reality, the big boy has just decided he was going to move around and got stuck in a position that has become uncomfortable. My wife will ask me “got a problem?” well yea I do, it’s not comfortable having my slong hanging halfway down my leg. So guess what? I’m moving that puppy back up. Ladies think of it this way, you know how your boobs get uncomfortable in your bra and you gotta move em around now and then? Same thing.
Next thing we hear quite often is “He never listens to me” or “”He always ignores me”, well I’m here to tell you that is simply not true. We do listen to you, we aren’t ignoring you, and we hear every word you say. Now hold on before you go all Terminator on me about if it wasn’t true then why don’t we answer or respond? Well let me tell you the truth behind it all. It’s circumstances and environment. Your talking at the wrong time. There are certain queues you need to look for before speaking to a guy. First queue: Is he watching sports? Is he watching a movie? Is he watching his favorite T.V. show? Is he watching Porn? (now this one you can get away with, if you join him because then he is going to hope that it will lead to sex while watching the porn. Second queue: Is he eating? Third queue: Is he trying to sleep? Fourth queue: Is he on the phone? Fifth queue: Is it a loaded question? If you can pick up on any one of these queues then you will know right off the bat you are not going to get a response to anything you say. The reason being is even though males are highly adept in multi-tasking and have actually made it an art form; when one of these queues are happening our multi-tasking is limited to certain things and talking is not one of them. If you want to talk while the T.V. is on then wait for a commercial unless it is a beer commercial. As I stated earlier you can get away with it with porn being on if you give him the impression that it will lead to sex or at least you providing oral sex.
If he is eating, his mouth and stomach are tied together and until he has gotten to a point in his meal where that umbilical can be severed he is unable to speak. The phone: I think this is obvious, it’s hard to talk to two people at once unless they are all a part of the same conversation. Is he sleeping? Well again pretty obvious, hard to respond to you if we are asleep and just like you, we don’t want to be woken up to hear about Mary’s boyfriend dumping her because she wouldn’t swallow. To respond to your next comment about sleeping, no ladies unlike you we don’t fake it. Then there is the loaded question. You will not get a response with these mainly just out of fear. We know by the question that no matter what we say it will be the wrong response so we have learned over time, which is why we are higher than the ape, that sometimes it’s better to nod and keep doing something else then to speak.
Finally, you may be saying, “He always falls asleep after sex, he never cuddles” well there is a medical explanation for this. During sex there is a transfer of blood from the brain and throughout the body to the penis which makes it grow so large and why some women have a hard time getting it all the way in their mouth. Well during sex, we are physically exerting ourselves and you actually burn more calories during sex then you do 30 minutes of exercise. Well once a man has his orgasm, the blood begins to rush back to the rest of the body, this is why the penis’ size goes down. Well that sudden rush of blood back to the body and to the head/brain causes a sudden dizziness and causes the man to pass out, going into a semi-coma. Once the body evens back out a couple hours later he will awaken and be ready to snuggle or even have sex again unless he is hungry.
Obviously there are more but those, I believe are the biggies. Hopefully this helps to better explain things and you women out there will less likely be inclined to get upset about not getting a response now that you have been made aware of why this happens.