Small Dogs: A Household Nightmare

Okay, first off let me start off by saying to all you small dog lovers I am not in any way out to upset or offend you so if you read this take it for what it is, my opinion only laced with fact.  With that said I really, REALLY, dislike small dogs.  Whoever said hey look at that little dog that resembles a rat, the same rodent that carried the black plague, I think we should domesticate it.  WHY I SAY!  WHY?  They are the most annoying creatures on this planet, well close to the most annoying anyway.  There are a couple others but thats for another blog.  I can not stand these ankle biters.

Both my grandmothers had a chiwawa and let me tell you these are nothing more than dogs with a size complex.  They climb as high as they can on the furniture when you come into the house and start barking or should I say yelping cause they can’t even bark like a real dog.  Instead it’s this annoying high pitch yelp which goes on for 20 mins without taking a breath.  I think they breath through their ass which enables them to yelp as long as they do.  And the shaking.  They constantly shake like they have parkinson’s disease or something.  And when they attack they can’t even bite you like a real dog.  Their like nats.  They run up, nip at you and run away.  Shit-Zues (yes I miss-spelled it, cause that’s what they are, little shits), they aren’t any better.  Smelly, vile, dogs.  Then you have the weiner dogs.  Why in the hell would you want a dog that looks like a hot dog?  I mean really.  Let’s go up a size, Bull Dogs.  They look like they ran face first into a cement wall.  If your going to own a dog, get a real dog.  Get a collie, or a border collie (considered one of the smartest dogs out there), or a husky.  These dogs are smart, gorgeous, and actually bark like a real dog.  These dogs will actually scare a robber away from your house unlike the smaller dogs who will most likely get kicked to the corner by the robber and never thought twice about.

Now dog clothes.  What in the hell is up with putting clothes on your dog.  You do realize most dogs were born with fur right?  And those that weren’t were meant to be that way.  These dogs were meant to live in the wild, it was us humans, thousands of years ago who saw them and said “Hey this dog keeps humping my leg, I think I’ll keep him as a pet, and I shall call him dog” and eventually they became domesticated.  They aren’t human damn it.  Get the freaking clothes off them.  Yes we all think of our pets as our kids.  It’s natural.  But there is a line that needs to be drawn, and some people cross it.  A big furry dog does not want a thick heavy sweater on him in 100 degree weather.  Come on people.  Get the clothes off them and let them look like what they are supposed to look like, a dog, not like a jamacian drug lord.  They are our pets and we love them.  Treat them as such, again their not human people.  They’d no sooner mount you as soon as you bent down to look under the couch than sit in your lap and let you pet it.

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6 thoughts on “Small Dogs: A Household Nightmare

  1. Sex, Spirit, Soul Mates and Chocolate....Ivonne's Journey

    I think we have the same pov on small dogs. My aunts 10 lb chiguagua attacked my 60 lb dog 3X—the third time was the charm and my dog responded. Luckily the little dog was fine. Oh and as for the clothes..I admit I dress Missy up –she like to wear her dresses but she just doesn’t like her picture being taken. I thinkit’s what women do when they don’t have kids–we dress up the dog instead. Missy has about 10 outfits, mosty pink……

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  2. Kitt Crescendo

    Ok…define small dogs. Mine are between 20-30 lbs, cousins to the akita and don’t bark unless there is an intruder. I rarely dress mine (except for the occasional Cowboy jersey or if I’m feeling particularly mean, Halloween or Christmas outfit) and if I do, they last maybe 5 minutes in the thing. They prefer wearing their natural two coats.

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      1. Kitt Crescendo

        Yeah… I’d agree…and small dogs seem to suffer from the same syndrome many small men have. I find tiny dogs tend to be more aggressive, but they’re so tiny that the damage is not so big.

        Reply
  3. Enyiria Gonere

    I own two small dogs, even though my favorite is the intelligent Border Collie. My 4 year old Boston terrier has been dressed up maybe . . . 3 times? For, like, 5 minutes or less each time.
    My Morkie puppy we got because, well, we didn’t wan’t a dog that could punk our Boston. We are never going to dress Maximus up, he doesn’t ankle-bite. Oh yeah, and he’s like 5 months old and already knows Sit, Down, Come, Roll Over, Belly-Up (lie on his back) and more.

    The reason many small dogs do that is because of their owners. If a big dog bit someone once, it would become “Okay, BAD DOG, we are going to train you ASAP.” If a small dog bit someone, it is, “Aww, he just gave me a love nibble,” or, “It’s alright, it doesn’t even hurt.” It is very similar with barking. If a small dog is trained like a big dog, they act like a big dog – and the only reason it can be harder to train a small dog not to do something like bark is because humans tend to be sympathetic.

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