Clowns.  Everyone knows who they are.  Some people are even fooled into liking them.  But reality is, clowns are just plain evil.  Now we’ve all at some point see one I’m sure.  Maybe at a children’s birthday party.  Maybe your parents hired the demon from hell for your own 10th birthday party.  Maybe you went to the circus and saw them.  Who knows but with the big red shoes, red nose that was burnt from the flames of hell, the razor sharp teeth, that silly outfit, and that shit eating grin, it’s all too apparent they are in fact evil, demon spawn, agent’s of satan, whatever you want to call them.

No human can do the things they do.  Can you squeeze your nose and it sound like a horn?  I don’t think so.  And that whole trick when they drive out in this tiny car in the middle of the ring and 30 clowns pile out, do they expect us to believe they all piled in there together and just happen to be extremely flexible?  I don’t think so, a portal to hell opened up inside that thing and their just filing out one by one.  Yet we think their cute, we immortilze them in figurines and dolls, unknowingly bringing their evil into the house so they can steal our bodies and drag us to the abyss or kill us and trap our souls forever.

We have all seen the movies, that is those of us who don’t pussy out every time a horror movie comes on and run to another room.  Spawn, what’s in it?  A demon from hell disquised as a clown.  Stephen King’s IT, what was it?  A freaking clown.  Zombieland, at the end when he was trying to save the girls who did he run into on his way?  You guessed it, zombie clown: Agent Of Evil.  And who could ever forget the evil clown doll in Poltergeist who’s arms grew and wrapped around the boy dragging him under the bed. 

Next time you see a clown perform or handing out balloons at a park to the little kids or you see that cute doll or figurine dressed as a clown with the smiling face, remember what you have read here today.  Remember all the books, REMEMBER all the movies.  They aren’t nice.  They aren’t cute.  They want your soul, they ARE pure evil incarnate.

On another topic, my wife loves clowns, does that make her evil too?  Anyway, visit her blog at


28 thoughts on “Clowns

  1. Shannygirl

    Gee…. wonder who you were talking about when you said “fooled into liking them”… I LOVE clowns.. LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM!!! Circus World was my mostest favorite place on earth as a child. Maybe I will dedicate a room in the big house you’ve promised me to a circus theme.. Clowns everywhere… Oooo maybe the kitchen! I can see it now.. have the circus train wallpaper circling the entire kitchen, canisters that resemble the big top and CLOWN PLATES.. so every time you eat dinner.. you’ll be staring at a nice clown! (Oh and I got the jab at you know who runnin out of the room)….

    Thank you for the shout out.

    1. radaronelson Post author

      I wasn’t talking about anyone in particular just people in general. You dedicate an entire room to clowns you can be sure I won’t be going in it. And I’ll be eating out of the pan and pots.

  2. Pingback: Send in the Clowns…. « shanson3871

  3. jokelly65

    nothing particularly evil about clowns, they are sweet, decent…. oh who am I kidding, Creepy little SOBs, who car pool with fifty of their buddies in car no bigger than a smart car. the only bright point is, when being stalked by killer clowns on a foggy night, the flap flap flap of floppy shoes gives them away.

    heres something to ponder, how many serial killer clowns can fit under a bed to wait for their victim? Beep beep Richy. LOL.

  4. Fat Bottom Girl

    I used to work with a guy who had coulrophobia (I knew there was a word for this, but had to google it :p). I guess I am one of those evil, clown-loving people, and don’t understand the clown phobia thing, so I decided to play a joke on him at work. We all had small cubbies where they would put important paperwork for us, etc., so one day me and one of the other girils found a nice, colorful picture of a clown and stuck it in his box. He totally freaked out when he started flipping through the papers and saw that picture!! Meanwhile, we were laughing so hard we almost pissed ourselves!! I know, I’m such a bitch. 🙂

  5. Kitt Crescendo

    Ever since “IT” I’ve had an innate distrust of clowns. I know there are good clowns and bad clowns…but still, before I make nice with a clown I ask to see teeth. If they’re all pointy and they have crazy eyes…I’m headed for the nearest exit. I don’t care if it’s simply because they had a really bad dentist. I’m not taking any chances.

  6. sakuraandme

    Hi! I’ve collected clowns for the last 14 years, you would hate my clown room 🙂
    This is my last day blogging for the next 2 weeks and I just wanted to wish you and your wife a Merry Christmas and Happy safe New Year! ……Paula xxxx


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